The absurdly complex construction/management/dwarf sim Dwarf Fortress turned 10 yesterday, and we here at Existential Gamer didn’t even notice. Thankfully, the far more diligent folks at PC Gamer did, spotting the 10th anniversary of the game entering alpha, taking the chance to commemorate one of the game’s underappreciated elements: its patch notes.

“Cleaned up the bear situation,” reads one from 2005 (back in the pre-alpha days, so who even knows what the bear situation was). In 2006 they “Added cat butchery,” but also “Stopped soldiers from going to parties,” which is a bit of a downer. Going ahead, they “Fixed a problem with blood hanging in the air,” (phew!) “Stopped booze food from melting, even though it probably should,” and fixed the fact that “ALL primates have front and back legs (with accompanying feet), no arms or hands, yet have fingers, somewhere.”

The game is still going strong in 2016, and thankfully, still are its bugs: apparently as of this year “All animals are described as ‘Gigantic’.”

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Executive Editor

Dom thinks too much, acts too little, and probably needs to get out more, to be honest. He writes about games, films, and life and stuff.

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